I was tweeting about poetry earlier on I thought I would put a load of stuff here. In no real order. Quality may vary wildly.
A Triptych of Poor Quality Poems Eventually Arriving at an Even Poorer Quality Joke.
i)
Hey! Simple rhymer
I don't have a timer
To make this scheme
A cuplet full of beans
No metronome
To tip-tap me home
No. That's not right.
ii)
This
Poem has
No rhyme scheme
Merely a scalene shape
And an increasingly large amount of
words per line so I suppose, theoretically
(Did I say words? I may have meant syllables, I'm confused)
It could expand to become an infinite line and leave room for nothing and no one else
and definitely not format correctly on the average computer screen. I had probably better stop it here.
Not that either.
iii)
I don't like easy rhymes.
Maybe I should keep it quiet
No one likes Homophonia
The Rhyme of the Ancient Malingerer.
When I was a younger man,
(Before my three score year and ten.)
I went to sea with a Pachyderm.
Because.
I had.
Taken.
A Tern.
Instead of anyone, a someone else.
(A man, I do believe was Welsh.)
A frabjul, dulcious place to be,
With Pachyderm upon the sea.
To sing, to dance - and once to chant!
Upon Sub-aqueous Ele-phant.
Keep your Whale!
(And your Dolphin)
Marlin
Trout
Wrass
(And Bluefin.)
No Unicorn or Griffin or Wyrm,
Can match my bobbing Pachyderm.
Upon an Island that we found
A Badger sold us half an ounce
Of Frantic Weevil Beetle Legs.
(We wore as crowns above our heads.)
A three masted schooner out of Ur
Offered Frankincense and Myrhh.
For just one hour of deep blue glee
With the pachyderm and me.
We Laughed
(haahohoheehee.)
Then set our course for Brumbledee.
Where we met Marsupial by the score
They never thought of it a chore
To cook up piles of current buns.
To fill up hungry Ele-tums.
In Mumbly where the Tapir live,
I bought the Elephant a wig.
He wore it
Sun
And Rain
And hail.
(He lost it in a force ten gale.)
Now much later (I have returned).
I share the gist of what I learned.
And that gist is not complex,
(This helps me keep it in my head.)
Never, ever miss a Chance,
To swim out with an Ele-phant.
Landscape with Nudes 1 & 2-
Amid desert plains
Rock stacks; epoch's patient eyes
strip them of verdure.
(Haiku, it's what doves do, innit?)
Landscape with Nudes: Redux.
Amid desert plains
Rock stacks; stripped of all verdure
by an Epoch's glance.
(Haiku, it's what drugged up Doves do, Innit?)
Fibunnacci Numbers.
Rabbit
Rabbit
RabbitRabbit
RabbitRabbitRabbit
RabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbit
RabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbit
RabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbitRabbit
Codex.
Said weather balloon.
Who?
Those onyx fellows
watch
Keep the corpses safe.
Where?
Radionic teeth.
Hurt.
Messages draw me
South.
Winged Horses.
Clockwork bees; spiral kisses for lusty anthers.
Tick-tock raindrops surprise the window.
Opaque air and melting tarmac.
Crystal moisture; diamond clothed eyes.
For every heartache a balm:
In yellowed grass seeds.
In misted sea breeze.
In frosted glasses.
A much needed drink (post torrid nights.)
Count no numbers. No days.
Autumn comes soon enough.
Why borrow her ragged cloak?
- Summer flaunts her fulsome dress.
Drop the soft-top, baby.
Tangle our hair.
Perseids burn up a spangled night canopy.
They and summer - fleet of foot
As winged horses.
Winged horses.
Quick Baby Poem.
Teat hand finger thumb.
Lie crawl walk run
Cry gurgle giggle chat
Um! Ba! Mum! Dad!
Happy wimble grizzle scream
Dirty nappy potty clean
Drink slurp swallow chew
Cat Miaow Cow Moo
Blue pink pale tan
Baby child boy man
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