Wednesday, 21 March 2012

Monologue: the Morning Prayer of Doris Laybring.

Dear God,

Now, I know it's not my place to complain and I know you have an infallible plan and all but I want to talk to you about the rapture. Mrs Clements from across the road has been raptured during the night. I know this becaus I can see the rapture squad over there now, they're bringing her stuff out in boxes to sell to the poor. They look very smart, they do you proud.

But, God, I have lived a good life, I've never cheated on Mr Laybring or turned him down when he wanted me to perform my wifely duties, even though he usually smells of swarfega and the whole business is rather messy and unpleasant. I've raised three children and they all go to church and vote the right way, if you know what I mean. But I'm still here.

And the people who are getting raptured, well. I'm not sure. Mrs Smith got raptured and I know for a fact before the legislation came in she had an abortion and she was cheating on her husband, and he's a Vicar! But I just thought she was a Vicar's wife so she's probably done her penance and squared everything, I mean, if anyone should know what's needed it's a Vicar right? And he does such good work, nearly everyone in the estate he ministers has been raptured, soon there won't be any poor to sell things to. Which I suppose is good.

But it's Mrs Clements that's really confused me. She had a book on evolution, you know. I saw it, I told the local council officer about it last week. In truth, I'm not even sure she believed in in you, I mean, she went to church but she only ever seemed to mouth the words. I never heard her singing. And she had some very strange friends around, odd haircuts, strange clothes, y'know the types. Criminals. And as for a Mr Clements, well, she doesn't even have any pictures of him and I've never seen him.

But Mrs Clements has been raptured and I do know you have a plan. I do. It just seems odd, that's all, that someone like her should be raptured before someone like me when I do everything that's asked of me.

Anyway, sorry to complain and please look after Mr Laybring while he's plumbing and please let him come home very tired.

Amen.

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